If misery loves company, I don't want to be its house guest!

Why is it that some people out there, mostly women, want to ruin an ex's relationship? It makes me so sick when someone wants to get back into someone's life so bad that they are willing to make up shit and say hateful things about a person they don't know. All because the said ex doesn't want to have anything to do with them. Maybe these girls should take a long hard look at why the relationship ended to begin with. These drama queens are willing to do ANYTHING. I can't say I hate these people, I will say that I feel sorry for them. They lack the confidence in themselves to move on and live life happy. I mean why would you want to destroy someone else's happiness if you were actually happy? Don't ever make accusations that could potentially be true, because I am the type of person that will call your bluff and call you to the table on your lies. Don't EVER use a child as a pawn in your manipulative means to bring back what was. The only one that will be hurt will be the child.

I am done dealing with immature little girls who can't keep their legs closed and then name 3 or more guys as potential fathers to their kid. 

My advice to these types of people, get your live in order and find a hobby, let the past be the past, and if you decide to make a statement that will have consequences, be prepared to face those consequences no matter what they are. False accusations will land you in a bad place. 

Also, if it involves my family then you need to understand, I will fight HELL itself to protect my family and make sure they are not taken advantage of. Call me a bitch, call me crazy......because you ain't seen nothing yet. 

Scrambled Eggs and Brain Cells

For as long as I have been alive I have not been able to "turn my mind off". Some people have to ability to do this and let their mind relax and be at peace. I have tried hundreds, if not thousands of times without success. I think about everything and analyze everything, mostly over thinking and over analyzing. I am a worrier too, which doesn't help at all. I have to have a plan A, B, C and D, and if those fail, I always have one in the works just in case.
That being said, this mental struggle my brain enjoys putting me through gets worse during the months of November and December. My stress level is sent through the roof and I feel like my heart will explode.
Through all of this I try and stay level for my kids and family. I don't want anyone to see on the outside what is going on on the inside. I probably would be committed if they saw it. Some say I am anal, some say I am laid back. I'm not sure how anyone could be both at the same time but I seem to manage it. Of all the "advice" I have been given on how to deal with this inherent monster, venting has been the best. I have really great friends that I can talk to, a wonderful husband who listens to me rant and rave (he has the patience of a saint, sometimes). Everyone needs someone, someway, or something to talk to about what they are going through. Holding in stress will make you bitter and can affect your health.
For those who truly know me, I am the easiest person to talk to. I am a great listener. I am here for anyone, anytime. A sounding board, a confidant, a friend.
So when your brain cells turn in to scrambled eggs, like mine do, just call on me.

Brutally Honest....as always. (Opening an infected wound)

My brutal honesty.
The real me: here goes. I am the most kind, loving, and forgiving person I know. I am also deeply sensitive and very insecure. I love to give attention to people, which can be easily misunderstood. I'm a pain in the ass. The I don't care shit is my protective shell. I care too much inside. I have a great sense of humor and I am very accepting of others. I am likely one of the most easy-going people around, but I over think my own shit and beat myself up a lot. All I want is someone in my life to love me despite my smothery side (and so far I have found that). Give me a break. Coach me lovingly and show me how to love myself enough that I don't drive others away as a means of protecting myself. I am very self aware and recognize that I push people away to avoid being hurt later. I throw myself into everything I do, which is overbearing. I love too much, forgive too easily, and will keep people who hurt me in my life because I'd rather have people hurt me than leave me. I am deeply appreciative of people and things and I like to show it. I am friendly. I love my friends deeply, which is often misread. I am interested in all kinds of things and can have fun anywhere. I am not judgmental. I am accepting of others, despite their quirks. I want that in return, but I can't find it. So there. Me. Complicated. My brutal honesty. My insecurity. Keeping it real. I'll say I dont care, but I do.

Beautiful Nothing

There is just something about me that screams "tell me your life story". I have been told many times that I am easy to talk to and this must be true because, no matter where I go someone starts up a conversation with me and its mostly about nothing. I don't mind most of the time, unless I am running late. About a month ago I was at the doctors office and the lady sitting next to me decided I needed to know all about her bowel issues. Even when I rolled my eyes, she kept on talking. I try to have sympathy but damn, I don't need to know about your shit!!! Well, yesterday, I was getting a pedicure and the lady doing it seemed to be off in another world because she really wasn't paying attention to what she was doing, so I asked her if she was feeling alright. BIG mistake, she started crying and telling me how much she hated fighting with her boyfriend and that her boss was an asshole, etc....it went on for about an hour. I felt bad, because I don't think she would have started crying if I had kept my mouth shut. Long story short, I gave her the best, old wisdom, advice I could and she was fine. Then I started thinking, I know scary right, sometimes we just need someone to talk to about nothing. Sometimes opening up our soul to others will release what is holding us back or making us have a bad day. No matter how we feel or look on the outside, we can feel like nothing on the inside. I don't mind so much listening to people bitch and moan, we all need to and we need to do it more often. Release your beautiful nothing, it may just turn into a majestical something. Bitch on people.

Heartfelt Compassion

Why is it that we don't "know" our neighbors anymore? What I mean is, when I was growing up we had backyard parties, neighborhood get togethers, etc. Now, its almost as if we don't care who lives next to us.
It seems like the only time we have care, compassion or concern is when/if someone has something tragic happen to them.
Today, I witnessed the complacent compassion when there was a terrible car accident in front of my home. You could see the looks of concern on peoples faces that stopped what they were doing to watch the medical personnel and police assist those injured. It was obviously bad because they had to call out the Life Saver helicopter. This is the same look that all of us had September 11th, 2001. Our country fervently came together and wanted "justice". Now, its all but a memory.
This "me" society is what is killing our heartfelt compassion for one another as human beings. We need to go back to appreciating life...not just our own life but others as well. Sometimes the simplest gesture of care goes a long way.

If you can dish it

So, here it is, my first blog. I am a very vocal person. If its on my mind, its out of my mouth. I have no filter and offer no apologies for this, its who I am. 
My intentions of being a Soap Box Hero is so others will have an outlet to vent, bitch, moan, whatever you call it about whatever they feel. HOWEVER, I will not allow stupidity on this site. If you feel strongly about something, then say it but also be open minded to what others have to say as well. 
That being said, lets pull out the soap box and take a stand. :D